Line Dance Study Guide

We're finalizing the guest list now, and if you found your way here using a magnet with our picture on it, there's a good chance you're on it. For those of you on the borderline, the deciding factors are whether you can be counted on to (1) sit quietly through the ceremony (2) behave completely riotously during the reception. By some quirk of anthropology, those two characteristics are frequently found in the same populations.

In an attempt to ensure the crowd stays on its feet for the duration of the party, we're only ordering one chair for every five guests. If you want to sit down (which I discourage), you'll have to bring your own.

We at OscArletta understand that some of you will be better prepared than others for the complex maneuvering that will be expected. What follows is the minimal curriculum that will ensure your slides are fully charged and shims well shammed. Of course, don't expect everything to be this linear, or orderly. The dances are listed in order of increasing difficulty, or decreasing maximum sobriety.

Electric Slide
This is one dance that should have critical mass, even with among total squares. If you don't know it, just get in the middle and try not to get stepped on.


Cha Cha Slide
This one seems to be a favorite, with a high movement:skill ratio. Not my favorite, but I understand we're not actually legally married without it.


Copperhead Road
We'll need a couple of country songs to make sure everybody feels equally at home, or equally awkward.

Shim Sham
Euclid tells us we need two points to make a line, so at least one other person will need to learn the Shim Sham if we're going to do it. It's a bit advanced for lesson one.

Slower, if that helps. Same leader, about 70 years earlier.


Superbad
Surprisingly easier than it looks, but most of you will need help with this one.


Auditions will be some time in March '09, with enough time to re-apply for those of you who need remedial help. If you've forgotten the Macarena, you're in good company, and are advised not to think of it again. The YMCA survived the cut only by intervention of the Bride, who enjoys any activity involving spelling and large scale exposure of underarms.

Faces from the book

So not everybody has their face in the book yet.  That's all right by me, I guess, since it's a dangerous habit to start.  As  soon as you get situated, you start getting stalked by old friends from forever ago, and the less you talked to them then, the more you hear from them now.  Currently Wendy's family is digitally way more networked than mine, but we're catching up.

Anyway, for those of you not cool enough or too cool for Facebook, we'll be cross-posting pictures and things here in order to level the playing field for all you picture-loving readers.

For starters, here is the first batch of the engagement photos, each one lovingly tagged by Wendy so you know which one of us is which.

If you do take the facebook leap, you'll be in good company.  To add Wendy as a friend, click here. Or, if you think the bride is popular enough, you can always add the groom.  The rest of the wedding party is left as an exercise for the reader.

In the Beginning

You all will soon see that Jay is the better writer in this group. I think I just kind of babble and ramble on about nothing... kind of like Seinfield. And catch me on a day that I haven't taken my ADD medication (like today). Ok, so this blog is supposed to be about wedding stuff. Well, for now at least... until we get married and I transform from "Wedding Wendy" to "Wendy the Wonderous Baby Maker." Let's put that off for awhile. WEDDING.

The save-the-dates are ordered. They should be arriving to mom and dad's house in about 10-12 business days... or so the e-mail says. The save-the-dates are magnets with a kissy face picture of us. The background is of one of the trains at the Huntsville Depot Roundhouse, and that's where the reception is going to be held. So, look for your invite in the coming months (no later than January... make it February).

Big news about the reception in the story below: While looking at the reception site with our wedding planner, Jay was in a particularly "comedic" mood. I almost thought that he was thinking about quitting his day job to become an event coordinator. My wedding planner and I were having a serious discussion about how the outside of the reception venue could be set up -- cocktail area, kids area, sign-in area, etc. Well, here is where my wonderful fiance chimes in with his humor that we all know and love. He suggests that we have zebra rides by the country store as well as a moonbounce. I guess this is where the bridezilla in me came out, but we'll sensor the story for the kids. Jay will probably post later and elaborate on this part later. To make a long story short, I rejected his idea at that moment. However, after talking to my mother and consulting my wedding planner, they thought it might not be a bad idea to have a moonbounce since there will be so many children coming with their parents. So, moonbounce is a go... Zebras are a no. Any thoughts?

I've gotta run to a meeting. I'll post again later.

Status: Still Engaged

In order to ensure as smooth a planning process as possible, the groom has been promoted to wedding blogger.  I'm starting to know what the senator from Washington, D.C. feels like.  I get to show up, look good, but my vote is mainly for show.  

So we've agreed on the name of the blog, a date, time, and place for the wedding, and I'm told a guest list.  If you haven't been notified, you're in good company.  I got cut from the list twice last week.

The official wedding site is worth looking at.  Its only major shortcoming is the length of its URL, which made it too long for the save-a-date magnets.  (Speaking of which, I'm looking forward to seeing which one of us ended up on the South side of the magnet.  I hear that's lucky.)

Preliminaries

In the grand tradition of TomKat, Bennifer, and Brangelina, meet Oscarletta. What you do is, you smush the two names together and make a new one.

So Wendy "Arletta" Short -> Oscar Carlton ==> oscarletta

It was funnier in my head.